I See Paris, I See France...

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The French Open tennis tournament is underway, and Venus Williams is causing a stir with her "Moulin Rouge"-inspired dress, complete with nude-colored panties. Television commentators and bloggers have almost worked themselves into a stroke discussing the daring look, and British comedian Russell Brand got in on the act on Jay Leno's show this week by caressing the middle photo from above and launching into a ten minute bit complete with lewd suggestions barely appropriate for t.v.
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U.S. Men's tennis continues to suck. Andy Roddick is currently the lone American male left in the tournament, and if you think he has a chance in hell of winning this tournament, then we're thinking you've been washing your hair this week in the lovely, black, oil-drenched water of the Louisiana Gulf Coast, because you've lost your mind. It's been 2003 since an American man last won a Grand Slam title, the longest drought for American tennis since the beginning of tennis. Roddick won the U.S. Open in 2003; taking advantage of a brief "gap" in tennis when all the old stars, (Sampras, Agassi), had recently retired or were about to retire, and new stars, (Federer, Nadal), had yet to emerge. But the world quickly realized that Roddick's lone title win was a fluke; his only talent was a booming serve, and once the other players figured out how to return it, Roddick's star quickly faded. Plus, Roddick had, and still has, all the maturity and emotional strength of a quivering 10 year-old girl at a Justin Bieber siting. We don't know where the next great American male tennis stars are hiding, but we wish they'd emerge, and soon!
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And in the "We're Too Dumb to Understand Our Own Technology" department, ESPN needs to get it together. As we were watching the tournament this afternoon on the ESPN2 Network, the televised matches we were watching had already been played, Paris being several hours ahead of American time zones. And right in the middle of the matches, there came the "crawl" at the bottom of the screen showing the winners and final scores of the very matches we were watching. Wow. Way to go, ESPN. We're guessing an Emmy Award is coming your way... sometime right after Andy Roddick wins the French Open.