The Williams Sisters, and Maybe Rafa Nadal, Are Out

Shockingly, just a short time after Serena was beaten at Wimbledon today, sister Venus also went down. Venus lost to Bulgarian Tsvetana Pironkova, the same player who beat her at last year's Wimbledon. It will be only the third time since 1999 that one of the Williams sisters will not win Wimbledon.

The message boards on several websites lit up today with charges of racism because the Wimbledon crowd cheered heartily against Serena today in her match with Marion Bartoli. Let us just say, we can almost guarantee that 98% of those people who think it's racist to cheer against Serena or Venus know nothing about sports, and therefore, have absolutely no idea what they're talking about. Throughout the history of sport, especially in tennis, the audience has always picked one person whom they root for, and very often, the audience roots for the underdog. It has nothing to do with race. If these people who are so casually accusing others of racism would do their homework, they'd find that whenever one player dominates tennis for awhile, the audience almost always cheers for their opponents. Cases in point: we can remember vividly when tennis crowds cheered against Martine Navritilova, Steffi Graf and Martina Hingis, and the last time we checked, none of those women are African Americans. Serena and Venus have dominated tennis for so many years now, you can feel a fatigue the audience has for them, especially when they easily beat their opponents in straight sets, robbing the audience of an interesting match. In last year's Wimbledon final, Serena dominated Vera Svonareva so thoroughly that it made the match boring and very disappointing. And Serena doesn't do herself any favors when she makes barely disguised swipes at the player who just defeated her, as she did today in her post-match press conference. But as we've said many times before, sport is all about the story, and the drama, and what better story was it today when Marion Bartoli, who almost never challenges Serena, was suddenly playing well enough to beat her. That's what the people were cheering for; they weren't cheering against a Black woman.


Someone fell asleep today at Wimbledon. We're guessing it was someone watching Maria Sharapova's match. The only thing more boring than watching Venus and Serena blow little girls off the court is Maria Sharapova's style of play. It's like watching paint dry, while someone's pulling your fingernails out.


Luckily, over on the men's side, as all the top men are still in the tournament. Pictured at right is Mikhail Youzhny, eating grass in his loss against Roger Federer today. Rafael Nadal beat Juan Martin del Potro in four sets today, but he might be out of the tournament with a foot injury. Let's hope not. And miraculously, we still have an American in the tournament. Mardy Fish beat Tomas Berdych today to advance to the quarterfinals.

Can Harrison Do It?

We've been begging for a long, long time for another great American tennis player, and it looks like our long, national tennis nightmare might finally be over. Ryan Harrison, the 19 year-old Shreveport native is already living up to his potential as American's next great tennis star.

We hinted a couple of days ago that Harrison might upset #7 seed David Ferrer today at Wimbledon, and so far, so good. He was leading two sets to one over Ferrer when the match was suspended for darkness. If he can come back tomorrow and finish off Ferrer, then he's got a chance to go far into the tournament. Laughingly, Andy Roddick commented about Harrison that he'd have to learn to control his emotions if he wants to become really great. Oh, right, this advice coming from a man, (Roddick), who because he never matured emotionally turned out to be one of the great American tennis under-achievers of all time. Maybe Roddick should just concentrate on getting past the third round of the tournament.

And speaking of whiners, Serena Williams was complaining today that she's had to play her past few matches on Court #2, instead of Court #1 or Centre Court. It is odd that the defending champion is not playing every match on Centre Court, but let's get real. Wimbledon is, at the end of the day, a business, and just a like t.v. programmers, the organizers of the tournament are going to schedule for the famed Centre Court the players with the most appeal. And frankly, most people are bored with Serena Williams' clunky, clydesdale horse-version of tennis. Williams is a great champion, no doubt, but her game is big and ugly and boring.

Wimbledon 2011 is Underway

Day 2 of Wimbledon 2011 is in the history books, and although there haven't yet been any interesting upsets, there are already some interesting stories.

Serena Williams, who hasn't played for a year due to a freak foot injury and later life-threatening blood cots in the lungs, won her first round match, afterwhich she dissolved into tears. Williams, the defending women's champion, later commented about her emotional display, stating that she surprised even herself about how much it meant to be able to play tennis again, especially at Wimbledon.

Meanwhile, sister Venus might have won her first round match, but she didn't win the favor of the British press with her odd-looking attire. Venus wore what looked to be a terry-cloth jumper and was promptly pilloried in the press.

The top four male contenders for the Wimbledon crown, Federer, Djokovic, Murray and Nadal all won their first round matches easily, as did American John Isner. By strange coincidence, Isner had to play Nicholas Mahut, the same opponent whom he needed 11+ hours over the course of three days to defeat in last year's Wimbledon. Luckily for Isner, he ousted Mahut today in less than two hours.

American disappointments James Blake and Donald Young went out in the first round, but the young man who truly looks to be American's next greatest hope for tennis greatness, Ryan Harrison, won. Harrison was defeated in the final round of the qualifying tournament, which left him on the sidelines of the tournament, but then entered the main draw at the last minute when someone else pulled out. He has a tough 2nd Round match against 7th seed, David Ferrer, but if he can somehow pull out an upset against Ferrer, he's got a chance to go a couple of more rounds, where he would then probably meet powerhouse Jo-Wifried Tsonga, and then someone named Roger Federer.

And of course, when it comes to Americans, and especially when it comes to American disappointments, we'll always have Andy Roddick. You gotta hand it to Roddick, who hasn't won a Major tournament since the 2003 U.S. Open, for, if nothing else, his naive chutzpah. Roddick, who long ago stopped being a threat in men's tennis, stated today that he thought he could go "to the semi-finals or even the finals of this year's Wimbledon". Wow. Really? Has he forgotten that there are at least a dozen men who are also in the tournament who he has little chance of defeating? Poor Andy. But you can't blame him for his enthusiasm; he just defeated in straight sets little-known Andreas Beck, although he needed a tie-break to win the second set. What former #1 player in the world wouldn't be encouraged if he just beat the 156th ranked player in the world?

Let's get real here. Roddick will struggle to beat Victor Hanescu in the next round, and if manages to get past Hanescu, he'll next have Lopez or Schuettler, both of whom are dangerous players. And even if he manages to get past those two rounds, he'll next face Gael Monfils, who's currently playing the best tennis of his life. If Roddick somehow manages to get past Monfils, he'll face Andy Murray in the quarterfinals. Oh my. Yes, Andy Roddick, you're on your way; on your way straight to the dustbin of great American coulda'-shoulda'-woulda's.

Serena Vs. Fashion: Game, Set... Disaster!

Serena Williams is getting ready to return to tennis after several months away from the game due to an injury, which is great; the sport desperately needs her. And she's already getting a lot of attention. But all the talk today was not about her game, rather the hot pink bodysuit she donned for a practice session.

Serena, we love ya, but... really?

Serena Pulls Out

In the 35 years of professional rankings in women's tennis, no #1 player has ever missed the U.S. Open. Until now. Serena Williams has pulled out of this month's U.S. Open due to a freak accident she suffered right after winning Wimbledon this summer. Evidently, she was at a restaurant in Munich when she stepped on broken glass, requiring surgery, and the injury hasn't healed in time to allow the current #1 women's player to play the U.S. Open in two weeks. Of course, we're still wondering what was really going on in that restaurant. Broken glass, Serena stepping on it, in Munich? Was she barefoot in a restaurant? What the hell was going on? A "Cabaret"-inspired naked dance-off that went horribly awry? Who knows?. But what we do know is that with Serena and Justine Henin both out of the tournament, the field is wide open for the women for the final Grand Slam championship of 2010. Maybe Kim Clijsters will repeat.
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One more thing we know is that U.S. Men's tennis continues to decline. When Andy Roddick recently dropped out of the Top Ten, it marked the first time since 1973 that no American man has been in the Top Ten. The U.S.T.A. is scrambling to promote youth tennis leagues around the country in an effort to "grow" another great American tennis champion, but with no potential contender currently in sight, we might be waiting for a long time for another Connors, McEnroe, Sampras, Courier or Agassi.

Sports Illustrated: The New Crazy?

We were excited to get our new Sports Illustrated today and to see that the venerable chronicler of sport had chosen a tennis cover this week, but then we read the headline:

"Serena Williams, Love Her, Hate Her, She's the Best Ever", and we almost fell off our chairs laughing. What's going on, Sports Illustrated, are you tired of the Tea Bagger crowd grabbing all the headlines this year for all the outrageously crazy things they say and do, and you've decided to make a conscious effort to snatch the mantle of "Most Crazy" away from them? Are you going for "Epic Crazy", you know, the type of crazy that leads one to don sackcloth and stand on the street corner yelling for the masses to repent for the coming of the Lord? Or did you just suffer a momentary lapse of good judgement in a slow sports news week and allow yourselves to publish a headline and article which is not only laughable but one which seriously erodes your credibility? Or is it just that the writer of the article, L. Jon Wertheim, has been hanging out in the Wimbledon locker room, banging Serena between sets?

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Something's going on, because no serious fan of tennis can take this article seriously. And it's most surprising to come from someone of Jon Wertheim's stature; he's a Senior Editor at Sports Illustrated and a very accomplished writer of sports and tennis books. He knows the game of tennis. But yet when we read the article, we couldn't help but think it sounded like something written by a 6th grader who had been asked to write an article about his most admired person, and he writes about his pretty, young teacher whiles he stares at her across the room and pines away.

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Look, we love Serena Williams, and we think what she and sister, Venus, has brought to the women's game of tennis has been tremendous. They've certainly helped the women's game to evolve, and if it weren't for them, no American would have won a Grand Slam tennis title since 2003. And after winning her fourth Wimbledon last week, which was also her thirteenth Grand Slam title, Serena certainly places herself among the all-time greats. But that's the key word: among. We all know, as any serious follower of sport knows, that you can never call one athlete the "greatest of all time" in his or her sport. It's impossible to compare players from different eras. In tennis, there has been the talk for years that Roger Federer is the greatest male player of all time, but we all know that you can't really make that claim with a straight face, among the many, many reasons being that Federer is playing with a completely different type of racket that didn't even exist 30 years ago. Who knows what Rod Laver, Jimmy Connors, Bjorn Borg or John McEnroe would have done with Federer's racket? We'll never know, and that's the point. The best one can do is to be satisfied with noting that certain players are among the greatest, but to name one as "the greatest" is just silly.

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But L. Jon Wertheim gave it his best effort. He gushed in his article about the physical strength of Serena and how she mows down her opponents; we guess he's forgetting that in just the past year, Serena didn't even make it to the finals of the U.S. Open or the French Open. But most laughable, he mentions the other greats that are still ahead of Serena in number of Grand Slam titles, Navratilova, Evert, Graf, but then, astonishingly, he simply wipes them all away by stating that Serena would have "just overpowered them" or "easily dissected their backhands". Really, Jon? Sorry, buddy, but you're out of your mind. Serena is downright gawky at times, and she can't move her massive bulk around the court without panting breathlessly; Steffi Graf would have run her ragged. And if you think Serena would have effortlessly passed Martina Navratilova at the net, you're nuts. Martina's net game was devastating on her opponents, which is why she has nine Wimbledon titles to Serena's four. Billie Jean King would have certainly been "smarter" on the court than Serena; no one could beat King in strategic thinking or aggression. We don't even think Serena could have beaten Monica Seles at her peak, in fact, the only reason why Seles doesn't have more Grand Slam titles than Serena is because of the stabbing which derailed Seles' career at its height. Unbelievably, Wertheim goes on to mention that the serve is the greatest stroke in tennis, and because Serena's serve is the hardest, that makes her the best player. Again, Jon, really? You might tell that to Steffi Graf who had a very soft serve, but whose overpowering forehand led her to 22 Grand Slam titles, including winning the "Grand Slam", (winning all four major titles in the same calendar year), and an Olympic gold medal in tennis. Chris Evert, between 1971 and 1983 never failed to reach at least the semi-finals of every Grand Slam event she entered, and of the 56 total Grand Slam tournaments in which she played, she made the semi-finals of 52 of them, made the finals of 34 of them, and won 18 of them. That's a breathtaking achievement, and one to which Serena will never even come close. Are you embarrassed yet, Wertheim? Even comparing Serena to the players of her own era, Wertheim must be conveniently forgetting that Justine Henin was routinely beating Serena just a few years ago before Henin abruptly retired from the game.

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So, please, SI, and especially L. Jon Wertheim, take a deep breath and get a huge, massive grip on yourselves. We understand that the magazine world is crumbling before our eyes, and that you need to skirt the edges of responsible journalism with your covers and headlines, at times, to continue to sell magazines, but publishing stories like the one you did this week with the Serena article is simply beyond the pale. It's laughable, it's insulting to people who really know the game of tennis, not to mention the other tennis "greats", and it strips you of any real credibility. What's next week's cover: "Andy Roddick: Greatest American Tennis Player of All Time"? Bitch, please!

And the World Yawned

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In one of the most boring matches in Wimbledon history, Serena Williams took her fourth All England Championship today over Russian Vera Svonoreva in straight sets. We like Serena, and we're happy for her win, but despite the fawning tennis commentators' glee over "what the Williams sisters have brought to the game", what the Williams sisters have brought to the game is exactly one of the reasons why tennis is fast losing popularity in America as a sport. The Williams sisters, Venus and Serena, have dominated the women's game for a decade now, but they did it by serving harder than the other women and simply by whacking the hell out of the ball with a screaming, (literally), ferocity. Deft touch? No. A beautiful net game? No. Finesse of any kind? Uh... no. Their games are ugly and brutish, and they rob the women's game of any beauty or wily finesse, which used to be the only reason to watch women's tennis. They've succeeded in doing to women's tennis what Pete Sampras did to men's tennis, which was to make it all about who could serve the hardest, and thereby making the game incredibly boring. Luckily for men's tennis, someone named Roger Federer came along right after Sampras and reminded the world that tennis is at its most entertaining when a player can alternate power with soft touch and really smart groundstrokes of various speeds. Federer will be remembered most for how he moved about the court like a graceful dancer, as if he was floating on air, unlike Serena Williams who, at times, awkwardly clomps about the court like a Clydesdale horse. Luckily, the Williams Sisters, at 30 and 28, are nearing the end of their careers, and here's to hoping that some new female champions will emerge who will bring some interest back to women's tennis. And please, Jesus, let's hope that tomorrow's men's final between Rafael Nadal and Tomas Berdych will be more interesting.

I Think I've Seen You Somewhere

(clockwise from upper left: Kvitova, Pironkova, Svonareva)

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Petra Kvitova, Vera Svonareva and Tsvetana Pironkova. Ever heard of these women? Do their names ring a bell? Probably not, but you're looking at three of the four semi-finalists at Wimbledon 2010. On the women's side, it's one of those weird years in which all the top players, Venus Williams, Cljisters, Henin, Sharapova, Jankovic, were defeated, and three almost virtual unknowns made it to the end.

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The 25 year-old Russian, Svonareva, is the best known of the three, already having had some success in the women's game; she made it to the semi-finals of the Australian Open in 2009, and she's currently ranked 21st in the world. But the other two came out of nowhere. Bulgarian Pironkova, ranked 81st in the world, has never made it past the 2nd Round of a Grand Slam. She was given almost no chance against 5-time Wimbledon champ, Venus Williams, in their quarterfinal match today, but Pironkova played a brilliant tactical game. She gave the power hitter Williams absolutely no power, lobbing soft ground strokes at her the entire match, which unsettled the American, never letting her find her footing in the match. Kvitova, the 21 year-old Czech is ranked 62 in the world and has never before been past the 4th round of a Grand Slam.

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But guess who's waiting in the wings for these three lucky gals? World #1 and the player with the fastest serve in the women's game, Serena Williams. Why don't we just end the women's championship today and hand Serena her 14th Grand Slam title?

Tuesday Morning Hangover

Serena Williams finally offered a sincere and heartfelt apology for her angry tirade at a lineswoman during the U.S. Open last week. Good for her. Now, Joe Wilson and Kanye West, take notes.
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South Carolina douchebag Joe Wilson first apologized for his "You lie!" shout at Pres. Obama last week, but as more and more right wing crazies squealed and flogged their privates in support of his outrageous act of disrespect, he began to dig in his heels. And now he's almost reveling in his new found notoriety and how he earned it. Fine. Keep it up Repub's. Keep letting more and more of the fringe element take over your party. You've already become almost irrelevent as a political party, and with more of this type of stuff, you're definitely headed for the tar pits.

Back to tennis, we're still in shock at Roger Federer's loss last night in the Men's Final of the U.S. Open to Argentinian Juan Martin del Potro. The 5-time defending champion, Federer, had the match on his racket several times, but it seemed as if he couldn't shake off his anger over some questionable calls, at one point even cursing the Umpire. Not to take away from del Potro; he's been the hottest player on tour all summer, but Roger and Serena should remember that you still have to earn your wins, and not just have them handed to you because you're the best players. In the end, we think it was Federer's and Williams' arrogance which did them in this time.

Jay Leno's new prime time show premiered last night. Television executives are salivating over the show's success or failure because the show is so much cheaper to produce than a scripted show. The suits see dollar signs. Maybe they should worry more about hiring the most creative writers, producers and actors, and then the ratings and profits would come. Because when your biggest concern is profit margin, you can be assured that 9 out of 10 times you'll turn out dreck. And for what it's worth, Leno's show was close to... well, what's something that's a little less disgusting than dreck? Dreck-Lite?

Sunday Musings

Last night's highly anticipated U.S. Open semi-final match-up between Serena Williams and Kim Clijsters endly bizarrely. Clijsters was clearly outplaying Serena, taking the first set 6-4. Serena had no answers for Clijsters incredible display of hitting and quick movement around the court. Serena is rarely challenged by anyone on the court these days, and she was feeling the heat. At the end of the first set, Serena slammed her racket on the court, breaking it, and a few seconds later banged it against the net post, earning a code violation. In the rules which govern professional tennis, the first code violation is a warning, and a second code violation means the loss of one point for the offender. In the second set, with Clijsters leading 6-5, one game from victory, Serena was serving at 15-30. Serena netted her next serve, and on the second serve a lineswoman called Foot Fault, making the score 15-40 and giving Clijsters two match points. Serena then walked over to the lineswoman and angrily said, "I'll take this fucking ball and shove it down your fucking throat," among other things. The umpire gave Serena her second code violation of the match, resulting in the loss of a point, which gave Clijsters the match.
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Everyone is going crazy today debating the incident. Some blame the improper call of "foot fault", some say Clijsters would have won the match anyway, and some are, unbelievably, trying to claim that Serena was "mistreated". In the end, the final truth is that it's clearly against the rules to verbally attack a linesperson. Period. Serena knew that, as does every other player in professional tennis, and mistreated or not, there was no excuse for Williams' behavior.
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Many sports commentators are already mentioning that this is a serious tarnish on what is otherwise a brilliant athletic career. And it will depend on Serena now to wipe away the ugly memory of a player angrily charging an official brandishing a large racket and cursing wildly in a heated rage. Let's hope she does.
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Tina Fey won an Emmy at last night's Creative Emmy Awards Ceremony for her work on NBC's "Saturday Night Live" in which she made several appearances as Sarah Palin. Well deserved. But then we read that Justin Timberlake also won an Emmy for his work on the same show in the episode in which he was the Host. Are you fucking kidding us? Justin Timberlake won an Emmy for acting? Come on. The Emmy Awards have long been a joke in the entertainment industry, many laugh that they hand out trophies like Pez Candy. But in recent years, the Emmys have increasingly become something akin to a perverted junior high school popularity contest. Instead of awarding real acting ability, the golden statues are handed out to reward "the most famous names", (in the Guest Categories, the biggest named movie star wins every time), handed out to reward lifetime achievement, and gosh darn it, just handed out to "people we like!" And if you don't think Timberlake's win is an insult to quality comedic work, note that this is the first time in the history of "Saturday Night Live" in which one of the Hosts won an Emmy. Right. Timberlake is, afterall, a more important comedic talent than previous hosts such as Richard Pryor, Steve Martin, Buck Henry, George Carlin, Bill Murray, Eric Idle and Peter Cook & Dudley Moore. Eeyack! (That was the sound of us throwing up.)
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Anytime a general public votes on an award, you get an element of "popularity" in the results, we get that. Case in point, "American Idol". And even though the Emmy Awards are voted on by people in the industry, they're still a public of people who like to reward their "favorites". The only way the Emmys can ever hope to regain any kind of real respect is if the voting is done by a board of governors/critics. Otherwise, what's next, Britney Spears wins for her role on "Masterpiece Theater"?
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There's a lot of talk about the "Blue Dog Democrats" who are impeding Pres. Obama's plan to overhaul the nation's health care system. Everyone knew the Republicans would fight Obama on this issue, (the Republicans have been 50-100 years behind the curve on every issue in the history of our country), but many are surprised that members of Obama's own party would oppose elements of the plan, including the "public option".

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Senior Senator from Arkansas, Blanche Lincoln, is one of these Blue Dogs. We've tried to find out why Lincoln opposes the public option, which is clearly the only way we'll ever have any real hope of ending rampant health insurance industry abuse. But all we can find is her vague assertion that the public option is "too expensive". Really, Blanche? The richest nation in the world can't afford to take care of the health of its own people? Yet we can spend billions and trillions in needless wars and pork such as bridges to nowhere? Get off it, Blanche. We know what the truth is. Arkansas is one of a handful of states in which over 85% of the people are covered by one insurance company; in Arkanas it's Blue Cross and Blue Shield. And if you believe that Blue Cross hasn't "gotten to" Blanche, then maybe that guy in Berkina Faso who keeps emailing us asking for our help in recovering his family's money should maybe start emailing you. You might actually be able to help him.
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Blanche Lincoln, and other Democrats like her, should do the right thing for Americans who are in need. Otherwise, we predict her stint in Congress will come to an abrupt end in 2010. And maybe it should.

Grand Slam with an Asterisk

(Novak Djokovic, Rod Laver Arena in Melbourne, Serena Williams)

Controversy at the Australian Open!

This is one major sporting event which should go down in history with an asterisk beside its name. The Australian Open, along with Wimbledon, The French Open and the U.S. Open, is one of the four major tennis tournaments of the year, and is currently in the semi-final rounds.

Of course, it's summer in Australia right now, and the nation happens to be suffering through a record heat wave. Temperatures on the court for the past few days have been over 140 degrees! Several players have forfeited matches due to heat fatigue.

But here's the controversy. The major show court, Rod Laver Arena, has a roof which can be closed to create an indoor stadium, complete with air conditioning. During the quarterfinal match between American Andy Roddick and Serbian Novak Djokovic, the #3 player in the world and defending Australian Open Champion, the temperatures soared and many wondered why the roof wasn't being closed. Djokovic easily won the first set, making Roddick look, at times, like a tennis beginner who had no idea what to do. Then, halfway through the second set, Djokovic started to experience heat fatigue and began losing the match. At times, he could barely move, and it was clear that he was under great physical stress. But the tournament officials refused to close the roof. Djokovic finally retired from the match, putting Roddick in the semi-finals. Quite simply, there is no way Roddick would have won that match if the heat had not intervened.

Then, the next day, American Serena Williams was playing Svetlana Kuznetsova in the quarterfinals, and Kuznetsova was handily beating Serena, who was also clearly suffering from the heat. Then, suddenly, in the second set, the roof began to close. Within minutes, the two woman were playing in an air conditioned, indoor arena, and Williams came back to win the match.

Who knows who would win despite the extreme conditions? This is sport, and anything can happen. Some commentators like Brad Gilbert were arguing that the winners should be those who are in the best condition while Patrick McEnroe was arguing that the winner of a tennis match should be the best tennis player, not the one who can best withstand extreme heat. All we're saying is that the tournament officials should be consistent, if they're going to leave the roof open for some, they should leave it open for all. Otherwise, at the end of the week, when we have a Grand Slam Tennis Champion, many will wonder if that person should have an asterisk beside his/her name. *Closed Roof Winner or *Open Roof Winner.