The Coach Gets Sidelined

In the third week of "Survivor", we'd hoped for more fireworks like the week before when the pec-engorged, crazy Shannon went on a crazy, homophobic rant and then had his ass handed to him by his tribemates. But it was not to be, this week's episode was actually fairly boring. Former Dallas Cowboys football coach, Jimmy Johnson, was voted out, but it wasn't so much because of anything he did wrong, but more the fact that some of the other men, particularly Marty, (shown here with the green-shirted Johnson), felt threatened by him. But we could see it coming a mile away; Johnson, at 67 and with a history of heart problems, just wasn't physically up to the task. From the first night in the jungle, Johnson was exhausted and mentioned several times that this extended camp-out was the hardest thing he'd ever done. See ya', Coach, don't let the palm frond hit you on the way out!

Fall Television Nears

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The new fall t.v. shows are about to premiere, thank god. We've been desperate for something interesting to watch; we mean, does anyone really watch the "New Jersey Housewives Network", formerly known as Bravo, anymore? We can't remember the last time we watched what used to be Bravo. Well, except for Kathy Griffin, come on.

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(jimmy johnson)

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But help is on its way, and one of our favorite shows, "Survivor", debuts on CBS next week. The show, which just won another Emmy for Jeff Probst as Best Reality Show Host, has been getting a lot of attention lately because of one of its cast members. The show, which takes place in Nicaragua, will feature Jimmy Johnson, the famous former coach of the Dallas Cowboys football team.

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(jud birza)

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But "Survivor" also always features a number of very good looking, well-built male contestants, and this new season is no exception. Contending for the hottest male contestant award are three guys, Jud, Chase and Shannon.

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Jud Birza, is a California model and actor, who among his other jobs, once modeled for Abercrombie and Fitch.

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(chase rice)

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Chase Rice is a former University of North Carolina football player who is now an aspiring country music singer and works in the pit crew for a professional race car team.

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"Survivor" also features a number of Hooterized, big-breasted female contestants, but the contestant sporting the most impressive rack this season is Shannon Elkins, a Louisiana-based extermination professional.

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(shannon elkins)

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Now the only "Survivor" cast feature left to determine is which one will be the gay one? There's always at least one, and we'll be watching, antennae up, to see if we can figure it out in the very first episode.